R’ חיים הלברשטאם, the גאון of Sanz, related that he received an inquiry from a רב who didn’t know a straightforward רש״י. “When I wrote my response to him,” רבי חיים said, “I didn’t know by which title to address him. I couldn’t call him גאון because that would be a lie. But not calling
Two lawyers, Goldfarb and Schwartz, opened a law firm in a non-Jewish part of town and hoping to attract goyish clients, called their firm Christian and Christian. On the very first call, when a prospective client asked for Mr. Christian, the receptionist asked: “Which Mr. Christian do you want, Goldfarb or Schwartz?”
Bill Gates advertised for a new chairman of Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates showed up at the job screening. Among them was Maurice Cohen, a small, bearded, speckled Jew. Bill Gates thanked the candidates for coming but asked all those who are not familiar with the JAVA programming language to leave. 2000 people rose and
It was late at night, when Sarah was woken from her sleep by thunder. Suddenly, as lightning lit up the dark, she saw the figure of a burglar outlined by the window. Frightened, she immediately woke up her husband and told him “There's a burglar standing by the window.” Slowly opening his eyes and seeing
Moshe’s parents were terribly frustrated at their son's inability to find a שידוך. Every time a שידוך was proposed, the girl’s father would test him on his learning and would immediately see that he wasn’t the brightest tool in the shed. At a friend’s suggestion, Moshe’s father hired a tutor to study a סוגיה of
Mendy and Michal went to pick up their car from the mechanic. He apologized profusely, telling them that it would take a few minutes because he had accidentally locked the keys inside the car. They waited while he worked to open the door on the driver’s side. It seemed to take forever. Michal was impatient,
Why is it that in קהלת, which was written by שלמה המלך in his old age, it states בן דוד, מלך ירושלים, while שיר השירים begins by merely stating אשר לשלמה? Apparently, it’s because to give מוסר and be heard, you need to be a great יחסן. But words delivered in song are listened attentively
A high school student once approached the מלבי״ם and said that he would like to continue his studies but that it's all but impossible for a Jew to be accepted to the university. Accordingly, he asked, whether he could pretend to be converting, while actually continuing to remain a true Jew. "After all" he said
Two women in a shtetel in pre-war Europe each had a daughter to marry off. There were no suitable boys available locally, so they wrote to a Yeshiva, described their daughters and families, and asked for a שידוך. The Yeshiva wrote back to each of them and told them that two boys would be arriving
Grandma took her two grandsons to the park. A woman approached her and said “You have such lovely boys. Tell me, how old are they?” “The doctor is four” explained grandma “and the lawyer is six.”
