A rabbi, a חזן and a shul president on a trip to South America were captured by bandits, who threatened to kill them. They were each offered one last wish. The rabbi said “I want to give a final two hour sermon on the esoteric meaning of life.” The חזן said “I want to give
A husband turned to his wife after the reading of the Megillah and said “You see, it says להיות כל איש שורר בביתו ומדבר כלשון עמו, that means you have to listen to me.” His wife replied: “You can’t bring a ראיה from גויים. After all, it’s written: בחוקותיהם לא תלכו.”
The childless daughter of a wealthy man in Vilna was an עגונה for 16 years. She had been married for only one year to a young man, when her father broke up the couple and sent her husband packing. He had not been heard from all those years, until a man appeared in town and
Following his death, a man was taken to the heavenly בית דין, where it was decreed that he be sent to גהינום. A week later, he was transferred to גן עדן. But just a few days later, he was told that he would have to return to גהינום. “What’s going on here?” he asked. The
A soldier who was drafted was determined to get out of military service. From his very first day on base, his behavior was extremely odd. He would pick up from the ground every piece of paper he saw, look at it, and throw it back. The presiding officer determined that he was not fit to
A husband and wife were in a difficult marriage. The husband said to his wife: "Look at the difference between us. All day, you do nothing but complain and curse me. I, however, don't have any complaints against you. To the contrary, when people curse you, I pray that I should be your כפרה.
A Shul in a small town in Ohio was looking for a Rabbi who could fill many shoes. The first candidate was asked about his experience, if he knows how to learn, if he is a בעל קורא, if he can serve as a שוחט and occasionally as a מוהל. He responded in the affirmative
Upon the death of an influential non-observant Jew, a רב was asked to speak at his funeral and say some words of שבח about the נפטר. Unable to refuse, the רב began: "הכתוב אומר: אין אדם אשר יעשה טוב ולא יחטא." The corollary of this is that "אין אדם אשר רק יחטא ולא יעשה איזה
The סנזר רב was known as אהבת ישראל. He once stated that ואהבת לרעך כמוך could be found in every פרשה of the תורה. One of the people listening asked where it could be found in פרשת בלק. The רב responded that the very name בלק spells ואהבת לרעך כמוך. Puzzled, the man said
A visitor to town said he was a חיוב and was therefore permitted to serve as the בעל תפילה. It was a disaster. The man had the most horrible voice and obviously didn’t know עברה. When the גבאי went up to tell him to step down, the man refused to budge. Two men who came
