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There was a שוחט in town who was known as being an absolute imbecile.  ר׳ אייזל חריף  commented: "בכל פעם שהוא שוחט בהמה, עובר הוא על לאו של ׳לא תעמוד על דם רעך.'"

A רב and his שמש came to the house of a Reform rabbi and saw that he was taking an afternoon nap בגילוי ראש.  The שמש asked "Isn't that an עבירה?"  "No," the רב responded. "שינת רשעים הנאה להם והנאה לעולם.  Therefore, by sleeping he's actually doing a מצוה and is פטור from covering his

The יעקב בני said to שכם that אות לכם אם תהיו כמונו because they knew that if they kill them while they are still גויים, there would be a great outcry from the entire world.  But if they circumcise themselves and are then killed as Jews, the nations of the world will be silent.

The "יהודי הקדוש" had two critics who harassed him. One was called בער and the other יקותיאל.  In referring to them, he would say: איש בער לא ידע וכסיל לא יבין את זאת.

A money-lender who charged ריבית, was מדקדק to charge for half a day as if it were a full day.  Citing פרק נה, פסוק כד of תהלים, they said about him אנשי דמים ומרמה לא יחצו דמיהם.

Esther was a frum woman but in stressful times she would visit a gypsy fortuneteller.  From time to time, she would urge her husband Shaul to join her, but he always refused.  One day, she assured him that the fortuneteller would be able to reach out into the world to come and have him speak

A man whose wife gave birth to a girl asked his רב to help him pick a name for her.   The רב suggested opening a חומש and randomly placing his finger on a word.  He did as the רב suggested and his finger fell on מכשפה.   I can't name her that.  We don't

The great ר׳ מאיר שפירא was asked why it is said that the modesty of משה רבינו was greater than that of אברהם אבינו, who compared himself to עפר ואפר.  What could be lower than that?  He responded by relating a story about ר׳ יונתן אייבשיץ, who each יום כיפור would leave his seat at

Rabbi Sam Wolfson was giving his speech to the Jewish federation about the "Tragedy of Jewish Assimilation."  Toward the end of his long speech, the Rabbi clapped his hands... waited 10 seconds... and clapped his hands again. The audience looked puzzled.  The Rabbi then explained that every time he clapped his hands, some Jew married

Menachem Begin delivered an address to a group of Palestinians and said: “Soon, we intend to give you full autonomy, so you can control and be responsible for your own affairs.”  His remarks were met with utter silence.  Surprised, Begin said: “Don’t you want autonomy?”  “Mr. Prime Minister,” the head of the group said, “אתה